The author has fulfilled their lifelong dream – holding their self-published book in their hands. But before diving headfirst into self-publishing, it’s wise to read the fine print–the kind so tiny you’d need a 300x magnifying glass just to grasp what you’re actually signing. Because behind every dream often lurks a contract that chains you to yet another illusion.
The Real Movie
The next scene feels like a cheap porn flick where you suddenly realize you’re not the star – you are the entire film crew. Your book lies buried on page 1000 in some online catalog, lost among forgotten titles. Even after searching with the “keywords” you were promised would work, it remains invisible – like a ghost haunting your own creation.
The Offense
And this, it turns out, is not even the most discouraging part. The real insult arrives when you start sending email after email, asking why you need to type out your entire book title like some magical incantation just to find it – only to receive a cold, corporate reply:
“This is the author’s responsibility – to make their book popular on social media.”
Short and sweet – you’re the marketing department, the salesperson, and the star of the show, just without any paycheck.
The Question
And then, in a quiet moment of clarity, the question hits:
“Wait… why am I with you? If I’m making the movie, then what exactly is your role?”
The Stripping of Hopes
From there begins the daily stripping of hopes – slow, painful, and utterly ineffective. Emails with offers for “online courses” that promise to help you make your book “visible.” Offers for extra advertising – as vague as a drunken flirt at 3 AM. And absurd promises that your book will become a bestseller and soon reach the heights of “Harry Potter.”
And yes, of course, all this comes at the cost of your last few–or many–dollars.
The Paid Road to Illusion
The poor author, driven by the desire to make their dream come true, digs deep into their thinning pocket and pays. Pays to be buried even deeper beneath a mountain of ads, endless courses, and “recommendations” from people whose main goal is to cash another check.
Secretly hoping that one morning they’ll wake up to neon signs outside their window bearing their name. But more often than not, the light shines from billboards featuring others – established names.
The Literary Mafia and the Hard Road
This is one of the methods every writer tries. Because in the literary mafia, where everything revolves around established names, it’s tough for anyone to notice your writing. If you’re not “somebody,” if you’re not different, if you’re not of an undefined gender, if you haven’t played golf with someone who owns a red Ferrari – you don’t stand a chance.
Yes, it’s that simple. And sorry for being so blunt.
Don Quixote’s Windmills
Sending out thousands of manuscripts to agents is like battling Don Quixote’s windmills. They don’t even open your letter because your name means nothing to them. It’s not whispered about, not recommended, and – worst of all – it’s not theirs.
So you decide to do it yourself – producer, director, screenwriter, and actor all in one. Because at least this way, you have full control over your failure.
Conclusion
In the end, you’re left alone with your book – no fans, no phenomena, an empty wallet, and drained hopes. Not because your words aren’t worth it, but because the world has turned its back on small dreams, leaving them to fight alone in the dark. If you’re not “somebody,” different, with a mysterious identity or contacts in established circles – you’re just another outsider in the literary mafia.
While you rummage through your empty pockets, publishers have already figured out how to sell you the next illusion in the form of an offer – and they do it with a smile.
Final Word
Or simply put: if you want the world to see your work, prepare to make the movie yourself. The cost? Your last dollars and many of your hopes.
And in the meantime – cheers to those who love illusions.